Haunting me
by Hanatamago2204
Summary: She can't forget those blue eyes that have been haunting her for weeks.
1. Chapter 1

Their eyes had met from across the room. Deep blue, trailing up and down the other's body. Frederikke had not known what had overcome her. A burning sensation, as if thousands of flames had been ignited underneath her skin, crawling and burning her alive.

The woman that was watching her was interesting, gorgeous. Hair that reached halfway down her chest, a slight smile that tugged on her fair skin. When she made her way over to Frederikke, it seemed Frederikke forgot how to breathe.

"Hello", the woman said, raising her voice a little over the music. She swirled her drink around in her glass, eyeing Frederikke once more. "I'm Signe", she said. Frederikke needed to remember how to breathe soon.

"Frederikke", she managed to get out, her eyes stuck in Signe's.

"Do you come here often", Signe asked. The question sounded nothing like a pick up line, more so like it was asked out of interest.

"I… No, I just…", Frederikke stammered.

"Care to dance?" The moment Signe touched Frederikke, the world seemed to stop turning. As if she was dreaming, Frederikke floated towards the dance floor, eyes only seeing the delicate sway of Signe's body.

The music was calm, not too overbearing, not too rough. They enjoyed themselves, smiling at each other as they moved back and forth. At some point, Frederikke even remembered how to breathe and think. Signe's eyes never left her, scanning her face.

As the evening grew older and the music grew dirtier, low basses piercing her chest, Frederikke found herself dancing closer and closer to the woman. Signe had let her arms circle around Frederikke's waist, their bodies almost touching. Another song came on and Frederikke allowed herself to be pulled closer, until their exposed skin touched and she felt another shock of electricity and fire spread through her. All she could see were Signe's eyes that studied her, drew her closer and closer into the trap. Frederikke didn't mind.

They twisted and turned, shimmied and caressed, hands gently exploring and giving Frederikke a fever. She forgot where she was, who she was and what she was doing. The only thing she remembered, were Signe's eyes. The blue that pierced her, struck her and left her dumbfounded.

She could feel Signe's breath ghost over her face as the fae-like woman drew closer still, closing the gap between their faces. Then suddenly, lips were over hers, robbing her of the last bit of sanity that Frederikke had left in her. It was a slow kiss, one that didn't seem to fit in the dirtiness of the club, the tension that filled the room.

Frederikke kissed back, just as slowly, savouring the moment. Her ears were ringing and she truly believed that her body was on fire. When she broke away for air, it was like she resurfaced after nearly drowning. She felt like she had been reborn, like she had discovered something that had been hidden for centuries. It made her addicted, she wanted more.

Signe was still looking at her, luring her back to the comfort of her lips. Frederikke didn't even try to resist and dived right back to her, as if she hadn't just nearly drowned. Signe reminded her of the sea.

They kissed and danced until Frederikke could barely stand on her feet anymore. The plan had been to go home after she had finished dancing, but Signe had taken away any will from her and replaced it with a desire for more.

Outside, their breaths danced on in the cold as they stumbled to the hotel Signe apparently stayed at. In the lift they kissed more, needing the contact as if it were precious air. Frederikke had stopped caring about the world around her.

She didn't even look at the room she entered after opening the door holding the number 317. She didn't notice the lack of a suitcase on the floor, didn't notice the TV standing in the corner or the spectacular view from outside the window. All Frederikke had eyes for, was Signe. How her skin seemed even whiter on the sheets. How her eyes seemed darker in the dim lit room, how Signe's mouth was slightly opened, lips slightly red from the kisses.

Frederikke gave in to her wanting to kiss her more, kiss her jaw, her neck. She let her hands roam underneath Signe's shirt, she listened to the little sighs that she drew from her with her mouth and hands. All the while she kept looking into the blue beneath her, the eyes that stared back at her, challenging her to do more, to give more.

Neither of them cared when the first piece of clothing landed on the floor. They kissed, touched and discovered. Getting greedier with every second that passed, feeling like they were running out of time. When Frederikke shed her last piece of clothing, she couldn't help but feel slightly insecure. Signe's eyes seemed to bore into her, taking in every millimetre of her skin, of her body. Only when the woman pinned her down and kissed her with a fiercer hunger, did she feel alright.

They rolled around, hands never leaving the other's skin, eyes never averting. It was as if they were falling, spiralling down, deeper and deeper.

The next morning, Signe's eyes were no longer on her. They disappeared with the woman in question, leaving Frederikke all on her own. Only the faint smell of her perfume remained.

Frederikke had never felt so relaxed before. She felt amazing, as if she was glowing. But it only lasted for a short time, until her phone informed her that Daan was worried for her, wondering where she was. With a sigh, she got up and headed for the shower. Still, the only thing that she saw were Signe's eyes. They send shivers down her spine, turned her and on and kept her on edge.

Remorse set in and Frederikke tried her best to scrub off last night. This was not supposed to happen. It had not been allowed to happen. But it did. She stood under the cold water for as long as she could manage, but the burning didn't stop. How was she ever going to tell Daan about this? Was she even going to tell him about this?

She turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. The towel was almost as soft as Signe's touch. Almost.

"What have I done", Frederikke whispered as she gathered her clothes and looked at the bed. No one could know. This had been a mistake, just a little slip up. Nothing would happen, it did not change the relationship she had with Daan.

It didn't change anything, she told herself as she walked out of the hotel and headed home. Nothing would be different.

Days had passed since that encounter with Signe. She had not told anyone what had happened that night. Even when Daan asked her why she had stayed out so late, why she had not returned home like he had expected her to, Frederikke stayed silent. Gave him an excuse that she had run into someone she knew and stayed there, her phone had run out of battery and so on.

From that night on, Signe didn't leave her mind. Everywhere Frederikke turned, she saw those eyes, those eyes that haunted her, even in her sleep. The ghosts of the touches she had felt in that hotel room still lingered on her skin. Frederikke could still hear the sighs and gasps Signe had made whenever her fingers had touched her. It drove her mad, left her breathless.

Daan had noticed that something was off. That something was bothering her. But she didn't utter a word about it, just left things the way they were. Every night, Frederikke hoped that the dreams would return, that the eyes would appear in front of her. Everywhere she went, she looked for the blonde of Signe's hair, the blue of her eyes. It was always in vain.

At some point, Frederikke couldn't think straight anymore. It was as if she was possessed, as if she quit an addictive drug. She craved more, wanted more of what Signe had shown her in those few hours.

She picked up the habit of running again, even if it was just a way of getting out of the house, away from Daan who looked at her with worried and suspicious eyes. He had yet to ask her whether she had someone else, but Frederikke thought it couldn't be too long anymore.

But everywhere she looked in town, there never was a sign of the woman that haunted her every move. Frederikke wondered if she would ever find someone who could make her feel that way again. There was nothing wrong with Daan, really. He was a sweetheart, made out of gold with a lot of patience. He wasn't bad in bed, he was romantic and cute. He was everything a woman could ask for. But somehow he didn't haunt her like Signe haunted her.

She had been pure, had everything she wanted. Yet it was not enough. Frederikke wanted to tell everyone about the feeling inside her, wanted to show them how much she wanted to be with that woman whose eyes never left her alone. But she couldn't. They had done things that should not be spoken of.

After three months, Frederikke gave in to the wish to return to the club where she had met Signe. She needed it, wanted it, craved it. Somewhere in her mind, she knew it was useless, she knew she wouldn't find her there. Signe had to find her, look for her. Not the other way around.

And she was right. She did see Signe on the dancefloor, drink in her hand, eyes wandering around the room. They skimmed over the direction where Frederikke stood and left her paralyzed again, hoping that the other would see her and come over to her. But it didn't happen. Their eyes didn't meet this time and Frederikke stood nailed to the floor for the rest of the night. Signe had not been looking for her that night.

Eventually, Signe left and Frederikke returned to the living. The fire inside of her was burning higher and higher again, fuelled by the glimpses of Signe she had seen that night.

When she returned home, Daan was still awake and looked at her with cold eyes.

"Who is he?", he asked her. Frederikke shook her head. "What does he have that I don't?" Again, she shook her head. She closed her eyes and tried not to think of the deep blue that she craved, tried not to give in.

Arms circled around her waist, pulled her against a warm and broad chest. She didn't deserve it, she thought. Sadness washed over her, tiredness and stress from the past weeks suddenly overpowering her. But she couldn't tell him. Couldn't say that it was a woman she wanted, a woman that had been taking over her mind slowly.

This time she managed to resist the urge for a few days. Daan had gone away on a trip with his friends, gone for a weekend full of beer and manly stories. Frederikke was left alone with her thoughts, that became soon very occupied with the woman from the club. On the second day after Daan had left, she decided to go back.

The club wasn't as full as the last few times. The music was still slow, like the first time she had met Signe. Some people were dancing, most were standing around the bar, getting their courage from the liquids. A familiar figure with blonde hair stood there as well.

And again, she was paralyzed. Her heart was beating harder, in time with the beat of the music. Frederikke wanted to move, wanted to walk over and greet the woman. Tell her how much she had been thinking of her. But she didn't. Like all the other times she had wanted to speak about her, she didn't.

When she was suddenly met with the piercing blue again, she forgot her name. Signe looked at her, took her in again while sipping her drink. The woman walked over to her, hips swaying and eyes never leaving her figure. Just like the first time. Frederikke didn't dare move a muscle.

"So you do come here often", Signe said when she reached Frederikke. The woman licked her lips, eyes fixated on Frederikke's.

"I guess so", she managed to bring out. Signe smiled and made her wish she knew how to bring that smile out more often.

"Want to dance?", she asked Frederikke.

Their routine started all over. At first, they danced a few decimetres apart, just enough distance to see that they were together, but nothing dirty. But as the night wore on again, they moved closer and closer. Before Frederikke knew what was happening, they were pressed against each other, kissing and exploring. Signe had lost the drink somewhere among the dancers. They only had eyes for each other again.

Yet again, they ended up riling each other up until Frederikke could barely stand. But this time, Signe seemed affected as well. She looked so beautiful that Frederikke just wanted to her way with her right here. On the dancefloor, so everyone could see how breath taking Signe could look.

Signe had other plans though and pulled her away from the dancefloor, out of the club. Back into the cold night, just like last time. This time, it was raining slightly and they hid from the water under an umbrella.

This time, Frederikke was brought to an apartment building. Again, they made out in the elevator, Signe pressed against the wall and Frederikke tasting her lips, her neck. And again, she was so focussed on the other woman, that she didn't pay attention to her environment. Frederikke didn't notice the marble on the floors, the chrome on the walls.

All of the beauty of the building was lost to her. She only saw Signe.

They stumbled through the door, into an apartment that seemed to be taken out of a magazine. White leather sofa, light carpet and dark leather chairs. A glass table and the newest Television. Signe guided her to the bedroom, never taking her hands off Frederikke.

The bed was big and incredibly soft, the sheets fresh and crisp. They smelled of summer, of grass. Signe was all over her before she knew it, tugging on her clothes and kissing the little parts of exposed skin. Frederikke let her, let the woman devour her. She was on fire again, burning with every touch of fingers and lips.

They tumbled and danced their own dance, clothes landing on the floor one after the other. Skin on skin contact, sighs and gasps. Frederikke wanted it all.

"Love me", she whispered to Signe, before being silenced by a kiss. Love me, she thought. Love me and never let me go.

When morning came this time, she wasn't alone. Signe was still sleeping next to her, blue eyes hidden behind her eyelids. She looked even more beautiful in daylight than Frederikke had dared to dream.

"Good morning", Signe whispered when she woke up.

"Good morning", she whispered back.

Both of them just stared at each other for a while, holding hands and caressing each other's arm. Signe smiled at her and Frederikke felt like she was falling in love. She then realised that she indeed was. Even though she barely knew the woman next to her.

"Want some coffee?" After nodding, Signe got up, exposing her smooth skin when her blanket fell. Frederikke wanted to kiss it. So she did.

Coffee had to wait a while, both of them getting too caught up in their little game of who could give the most kisses. It felt so right, standing in Signe's kitchen together, cup of coffee in their hands. They exchanged quiet smiles as they drank and returned to bed when they were done drinking. Signe now tasted of coffee and a hint of alcohol from yesterday.

It wasn't until late in the afternoon that Frederikke decided she had to go home. But when Signe asked her to stay for dinner and her eyes met Frederikke's, she couldn't say no. So she stayed.

The situation repeated itself that night, when Signe asked her to spend the night again. They washed Frederikke's clothes and Signe found an old night shirt somewhere in the back of her closet. While they laid in bed, they kissed and touched, but didn't go as far as the last night. Eventually, Signe fell asleep in her arms, clinging to her like she was a teddy bear.

Frederikke thought she was the luckiest woman on earth.

* * *

~Hana


	2. Chapter 2

Again, Frederikke left without any way of contacting Signe. No phone number, no email address. She didn't even know where she had stayed the past few days. Not even a place where she knew the other would come. She had nothing.

And of course she only realised this when she was almost home.

Once inside her house, Frederikke headed straight for the shower. Not that she really had to, Signe and she had showered together the night before. But she needed time to think, and what better place to do that than in the shower?

She put a calming song on repeat, one she had been listening to again and again since she met Signe. Then, she grabbed her favourite jumper and some nice joggers and headed into the shower. While she waited for the water to turn warm, she tippled on her toes to keep herself warm.

Finally, she deemed the temperature right and she stepped under the water, let it embrace and relax her. Frederikke closed her eyes. Breathed in deep and just relaxed. She tried not to think of anything, nothing at all. But Signe seemed to be all around her, her hands still seemed to linger on her body, her taste still on Frederikke's lips.

How could she let this happen? Why did she always end up in situations like this? Why did she let it happen a second time?

With a sigh, she brushed the hair out of her face.

"Frederikke, you are an idiot", she told herself. "A really big idiot."

Her legs started to feel like pudding and she felt slightly dizzy from the heat. She sat down on the floor, head resting against the wall.

"How am I ever going to get out of this mess?"

The answer was simple. She wasn't. The mess got bigger and bigger. It didn't help that Daan returned from his trip and Frederikke just thought of it as a nuisance. Nor did it help that he confronted her about her behaviour.

"You've been so distant the past few weeks. You barely texted me while I was gone, you don't want to go out together or… Or cuddle. It's like you don't care about me anymore. Is there someone else?"

His words had hurt her, in a way. She didn't mean to be this way, to create distance between them. Betraying him was the last thing on her mind. Yet here she was, doing exactly that.

"It's nothing, I just feel a little stressed", she had said. While speaking, she had avoided Daan's eyes. "Just need a break from work, need some time to collect myself." She almost believed herself.

But it appeared that a break could not stop her thoughts either. Everywhere she went, it was always Signe. Be it her eyes, her voice, her touch. Even the colour of her hair or her skin seemed to haunt Frederikke.

Her boss noticed and told her off, which only made her mood worse. After two weeks, she was about to kick everyone who would get in her way.

One more word and she would break. One more bad thing that would happen and she would lose her cool. She was so done with the insecurity, the effect Signe had on her. Hated how she missed that woman that only seemed to toy with her and didn't take her seriously. Done with everything and everyone.

It was nothing like her to feel this way. Sure, she had crushed on a woman before, that's how she had discovered that she was bi-sexual. But it was new to her that the feelings were so strong and didn't seem to leave her. Every little bit of information about Signe got sucked into her brain, as if there was a dried out sponge up there. Every little detail, every sound and every gesture was carved into her, only to haunt her when Signe was gone. It drove her mad.

Usually, Frederikke had small crushes. It had been that way all the time, until she had met Daan. But even that was nothing compared to the feelings she harboured for Signe. He was more of a companion to her, someone to share your stories with while drinking a beer after work. Daan really was her best friend and she was so lucky to have him.

Yet these feelings for Signe were taking control of her life and Frederikke feared it. She feared what they were doing to her, how they were ruining the stable little life she had built in the past few years. They might ruin it all.

Daan grew more and more impatient with her, until he eventually gave up trying. He didn't talk to her about the different behaviour anymore, he didn't initiate contact, didn't kiss her good night. At a certain point, they just co-existed in their homes. They were no longer a couple.

Frederikke knew she had to explain to him what was going on, needed to tell him that there was someone else running around in her head. It was the least she could do after everything he had put up with.

But she didn't dare to. She was too afraid of what he would say now, too deep in the ocean, lured in by Signe's eyes. It was as if the woman was a siren, that sang beautifully for her. And Frederikke just jumped right into the icy water, not caring that she couldn't swim. The siren dragged her down, killed her and robbed her from everything that was dear to her. She used her and Frederikke couldn't do anything but smile happily at her pretty face.

So she hid her secret behind a mask of happiness and kept increasing the distance between her and Daan.

In the end, it was Frederikke who caved in. Who broke down crying at the dinner table, sobbing her sorrows out. She told Daan what had happened, told him how she felt and why she had been behaving the way she had.

He didn't get mad. He didn't shout, scream or bang his fist on the table. He didn't even say a word. His eyes were trained on Frederikke, who still cried, head between her hands.

"I'm glad you finally told me", he said and he sounded so heartbroken it hurt. Then he got up and left the house, closing the door softly behind him.

A part of Frederikke really wanted to run after him, apologise and tell him that she didn't mean what she had said, that she wanted him back. But the other, bigger part of her knew that it wouldn't work anymore. She had already made her choice the night she had left to find Signe again, and there was no going back.

For how long she had been sitting at the dinner table, food gone cold and Daan gone, she didn't know. Long enough for the lights outside to go on. Not long enough for the pain to go away. Of all the things that could have happened, Daan leaving was the worst. Now she was truly alone, with no one to run to.

She decided that perhaps she should just call it a night. Without cleaning up anything, she went to bed. Stripped off her clothes and let them lie on the floor. Crawled into her bed and pulled the covers over her head. With a sigh, she rolled onto her side and stared at the wall.

"Well… This is where it ends", she whispered to nothing in particular. There wasn't anyone to talk to, yet here she was.

"I mean, I guess his reaction should have been something to expect. Of course he was not going to stay after what I've done. But I had expected him to get upset, to yell at me or something. The way he reacted now was kind of creepy. Also Daan-like, in a way." Frederikke sighed again and pulled the covers closer around her.

"Way to go Frederikke, way to go…" Not long after, she fell asleep.

In her dreams, she met Signe again. They were going out together and had been a pair for a long time. Frederikke was going to propose to her today and the nerves were running through her body. Everyone around her wished her luck. It was the perfect setting, wonderfully romantic, complete with sunset and music. But just when Signe was going to give her answer, Frederikke woke up, back into the real world.

At least she now knew that she was pretty serious about that woman, she thought while she was getting her breakfast ready. Not once had she thought or dreamed about getting married to Daan, or any of her exes. Signe really was something special. But it was still unsure how the other felt, and if the recent events were anything to go by, the woman wasn't half as serious as Frederikke was.

She had no plans for today. Daan would probably come back to retrieve his things from their home, which was now her home. Most likely, she would go look for something cheaper though. It would be strange to walk around the rooms that held so many memories.

Only now did she realise what she had done. What had happened, how she had destroyed everything she had. They say you only know what you have once it's gone. For this situation, it was surely true.

For the first time since she had met Signe and had made the choice to follow her, Frederikke cried. Everything dear to her, everything she had held in honour, was now gone, perished because of what she had done. Her world seemed to come crashing down around her as she realised that she was all on her own.

Right at that point, Daan decided to drop by. He caught her crying and moved towards her. But he stopped himself. It wasn't his place anymore to console her, wasn't him she needed. So he turned around and headed into the bedroom. To Frederikke, it felt like a punch to the stomach.

It only took Daan a few days to get everything cleared out. Frederikke didn't know where he was staying, possibly with his sister or his brother. Perhaps he had found a new home. It wasn't important. Day after day, Frederikke had stood under the water, trying to wash away the feeling that still resided in her chest. And every time she stepped out, the feeling didn't go away.

She remembered the times she had showered with Signe, the time they had made out in front of the mirror. Every time she saw her own body, she saw the woman's hands roam over her skin, squeeze her, scratch her. Her lips still seemed to touch her, whispers of kisses on her neck, her shoulders. It drove her to madness.

Her dreams were not much better. They were always filled with Signe, the two of them going on dates, sitting in a living room together, cooking together or making love. It was always Signe, everywhere she went.

At some point, Frederikke couldn't take it anymore. She had broken down in her bedroom, screaming at the walls, the mirror, the bed. Telling the universe, god or any deity that had control over her that she wanted to be cured from this curse. That she didn't want to be haunted anymore. But it didn't help.

The room had captured all of her sobs, kept them from the outside world. It hid the tears that fell from her cheeks, the screams she had let out. No one saw how she lost her cool, how she thrashed around in the sheets and ripped at her hair, her clothes.

When she finally collected herself again, she felt exhausted. A part of her wanted to go for another shower, but her body refused to listen to her. So Frederikke stayed where she was, a blanket pooled around her feet, clothes a mess and hair all over the place. That's how she fell asleep for hours, until late in the afternoon the next day.

That night, she ventured out again. To the place where it had all started. She didn't expect to find the other woman there. The point of her visit was to drink the pain away, a last time trip. After this, she wouldn't return to that place anymore, she had told herself.

But Signe was there, of course she was there. And this time, she was looking at Frederikke. Their eyes met as soon as the other walked through the door. It seemed as if Signe had been waiting all evening for her, eyes trained on the doorway.

Unlike the other times, Frederikke didn't freeze up. She didn't wait for Signe to come over to where she stood. Instead, Frederikke headed to the bar and ordered a drink, knocking it over in one go. "Let her come", she thought. "I'm ready."

Signe did come over. Hips swaying like they always did, eyes set on her prey, like the last time. A soft smile around her lips this time. She seemed happy to see Frederikke.

"We keep running into each other, don't we", she said as a greeting. Frederikke nodded and called for a second drink.

"Seems like we do."

They didn't talk a lot more after that, instead let their eyes wander across the room. In the end, they'd end up looking at each other again. Signe moved closer to Frederikke until their arms were touching, which earned her a raised brow.

"Ready to get out of here yet, or do you need a few more drinks", Signe asked after a while.

"No, I'm good. Your place or mine?"

For the first time, Signe let Frederikke decide, who settled for her own place. A part of her just really wanted to show off what she had, even if it wasn't much. It was exciting to know that Signe would see her house, her bedroom, her bathroom. To Frederikke, it felt as if your long high school crush finally came to visit you for a study session together. She felt nervous.

Once at home, they quickly tumbled into the bedroom, taking no time to turn on lights or appreciate what was inside the room. Just like the first time, they were all over each other. Touching, feeling, tasting and exploring. Signe was a little louder than the other times, sighing whenever Frederikke's hands moved around her skin.

They took their time caressing and playing. Frederikke wasn't in a hurry to wrap things up, instead wanted to savour the feeling of having Signe beneath her. They kissed lots.

When things finally came to an end, Frederikke and Signe were both exhausted. Panting and sweating, they collapsed onto the bed and stared at each other. It was too dark to actually see a lot, but they still looked.

"So, what are we", Frederikke suddenly asked after regaining her breath. The question startled Signe and she didn't respond at first.

"If you are asking if we are dating, we're not. I don't date people."

That was a shock. It felt as if someone had just hit Frederikke in the stomach and then twisted their fist around for a little. Yes, it hurt and it wasn't fun at all.

"Oh", she managed. Then she turned around.

"I'm sorry if I hurt you", Signe said. Frederikke shrugged, but the gesture was lost in the darkness.

"Good night", Frederikke mumbled and hid herself under the blanket.


End file.
